Tag Archives: Gremlins

A Holiday Horrorthon

Merry Christmas! The orgiastic ritual of consumption and regurgitation—of taking and giving and taking again—has ended and you’re now sitting around wondering what to do. Somehow you wound up here with us on this fine day, and if the forecast is holding as your reading this it is a fine day indeed out there. So let’s get to it, I know why you’re here after all. It is no real secret to me, nor to any of the Morbid Movies staff; you’re here because now that you’ve watched Black Christmas with us earlier this month and Rare Exports a few days ago at my request, you’re now uncertain as to how you should proceed with your horrific holiday viewing. I’m glad to be of assistance.

I need to preface the rest of this article with this disclaimer: there is only one movie in the following discussion that I think you HAVE to watch, watch the rest in order to achieve that perfect mixed tape kind of feel. Alright, time to stop dragging my feet and get to it, and so here, without further ado, is my perfect holiday horrorthon.

Rare Exports (2010)

If you haven’t watched it yet, here are some good reasons to. You may have already watched this, probably have, but if you’ve saved it for the big day don’t hesitate to pull the trigger on this one early. Here’s the synopsis* “In the depths of the Korvatunturi mountains, 486 metres deep, lies the closest ever guarded secret of Christmas. The time has come to dig it up! This Christmas everyone will believe in Santa Claus.”

Gremlins (1984)

It makes sense to go from Rare Exports with the demented and delightfully mad cap tale of a boy and his mogwai gone awry. The levity here is a perfect bridge between this and the next film I recommend to you. So spend a few hours lost in the childlike joy that this film is guaranteed to bring to you each and every time you hit play on the VCR. You know what this one is about, so I will spare you the synopsis.

Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)

The description of this film courtesty of IMDB is as follows: After his parents are murdered, a tormented teenager goes on a murderous rampage dressed as Santa, due to his stay at an orphanage where he was abused by the Mother Superior,  and that description still doesn’t come close to the actual experience of being there as this classic plays out its twisted happenings. Here’s the thing though about this one, and it might be the thing that absolutely elevates this one above Black Christmas for me, it’s a very mean spirited and blackly comedic film. The film is just so much fun with its patently ludicrous plot and gleeful dissimulation of the consumerism surrounding the holiday. This one definitely deserves a viewing later on today.

A Christmas Horror Story (2015)

In this film, “Interwoven stories that take place on Christmas Eve, as told by one festive radio host: A family brings home more than a Christmas tree, a student documentary becomes a living nightmare, a Christmas spirit terrorizes, Santa slays evil.” This one needs to come after Gremlins and Silent Night, as it takes the nuttiness of both films and takes them to new heights. This anthology film is a solid bit of fun filmmaking and should be viewed ASAP.

The list is good so far and It is almost perfect. Here are the final two finals to throw up on the screen at the end of the night.

Krampus (2015)

Director Michael Dougherty is responsible for two penultimate holiday horror films. The first was Trick r Treat and the second, Krampus, should be required viewing in the month of December. This film is as twisted as the other films on the list, and it serves as a perfect evolved form of the family-friendly, holiday horror film. It’s a great way to send the kids off to bed. Here is the synopsis: “A boy who has a bad Christmas ends up accidentally summoning a festive demon to his family home.” This film is an action filled romp that contains some truly disturbing creature design, and should not be missed. (Note: this film can be switched with Gremlins and the flow of films will still be solid.)

Inside (2007)

I saved the best for last. This is not a movie I recommend lightly, and it is certainly not for the kids. Inside is not only the best Christmas horror film, it’s also one of the best horror movies ever made period. Directors Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury created a Christmas film that is as  brutal and vicious and relentless as it is beautiful and sumptuous and fascinating. Other than the following synopsis, I am not not going to try to sell you on this film. “A young woman, recently widowed, goes to sleep on Christmas Eve planning to induce the birth of her baby on Christmas Day. She wakes in the night to find an intruder who wants to remove the baby a little earlier than intended, and she is forced to fight for her life and the life of her unborn child as she tries to fend off this scissor wielding maniac.” It’s even more depraved than you think or remember. Warning, it is a French film so there will be subtitles. DO NOT WATCH THE AMERICAN MADE REMAKE. I REPEAT, DO NOT WATCH THE REMAKE. IF THEY ARE NOT SPEAKING FRENCH THEN TURN IT OFF.

So there it is, my suggestions for the things you may want to watch on this beautiful South Florida Christmas Day. I hope you, dear reader, have had a wonderful holiday season.

Top 10 Tuesday: Holiday Horrors

What’s Top 10 Tuesday? It’s a new Top 10 List every Tuesday!

With Halloween fast approaching and September’s Palm Beach County Grindhouse Series screening of Trick ‘r Treat,  this Tuesday I celebrated the various Holiday themed Horror movies. And yes, there’s more than just Christmas and Halloween!

Honorable Mention, Leprechaun (1993)
St. Patrick’s Day

It’s a bit of a stretch  but without this film that’s heavy on Irish folklore we wouldn’t have Leprechaun in the Hood.

 

10. ThanksKilling (2009)
Thanksgiving

While Eli Roth’s Thanksgiving from the Grindhouse Trailers may never get made, we’ll always have ThanksKilling. A homicidal turkey (puppet) kills college students during Thanksgiving break. It may not be a good movie but it’s funny as hell.

9. New Year’s Evil (1980)
New Year’s Eve

This slasher film features a pretty unique story with a radio show getting calls from a killer every hour when the different time zone’s hit Midnight.

8. Mother’s Day (1980)
Mother’s Day

It may not actually take place on Mother’s Day but it still works quite well. Two brother’s torture and kidnap women to please their insane mother. One of the better non-Toxic Avenger Troma films.

7. Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2010)
Christmas

Finnish-made Christmas movie about a accidentally finding the secret tomb of Santa Claus. After reindeer are slaughtered and Children start to go missing, it’s believed that a monstrous Santa Claus is to blame.key to why reindeer are being slaughtered and children are disappearing.

6. Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)
Halloween

Sure it may be controversial that the movie I include from the Halloween Series doesn’t have Michael Myers… but it’s also my favorite Halloween and Holiday-related movie of all time. Season of the Witch is an  insane but fun story about a company using their Halloween masks to kill off Children.

5. My Bloody Valentine (1981)
Valentine’s Day

By far the best Holiday Horror that’s not Christmas or Halloween-related, featuring “Harry Warden” in a spooky miner costume killing off people trying to celebrate Valentine’s Day.

4. Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)
Christmas

Silent Night, Deadly Night may not be the best Holiday Horror or even that great of a movie but i’ll be damned if it’s not one of the most fun. Features tons of creative kills and a very believable psychopath played by Robert Brian Wilson.

3. Trick ‘r Treat (2007)
Halloween

A perfect anthology of Halloween-related horror stories all brought together by a cute little Pumpkin demon. Trick ‘r Treat was actually finished in 2007 but wasn’t released until 2009 due to problems with distribution. We’re still waiting for a Trick ‘r Treat 2…

2. Gremlins (1984)
Christmas

While this may be the most family-friendly film on the list, Gremlins still managed to scare a lot of kids in it’s day. The story of a boy receiving a strange pet for Christmas which then leads to almost entirely destroying a city. Gremlins 3 is expected to be released in 2018.

1. Black Christmas (1974)
Christmas

Black Christmas is not only a great Holiday Horror movie it’s also one of the earliest in the slasher genre. Black Christmas is one of the first that manages to keep the killer a secret for the entire film. Directed by Bob Clark who 5 years later went on to direct one of the most well-known Christmas movies of all time, A Christmas Story.

I thought this list would be a lot easier to do but I didn’t realize how many Holiday-related Horror movies are some of my favorites. It’d be nice to see some newer Holiday Horrors not related to Halloween or Christmas though. Don’t forget on September 22nd I kick off Halloween early with a screening of Trick ‘r Treat! See you next Tuesday for an all-new Top 10 List!

What’s YOUR favorite Holiday Horror?